Tales from Orlando: Heaven on Earth (otherwise known as drinking at Disney World)

by Justin D'Olier on June 30, 2011 | Comments Off on Tales from Orlando: Heaven on Earth (otherwise known as drinking at Disney World) |

I’m a Disney guy. I truly believe Disneyland is the Happiest Place on Earth. Give me the cheesy, immersive, rodent-centric, family-oriented pleasures of a Disney theme park over the adrenaline fueled thrills of a Six Flags or Busch Gardens. You can have your 100 mph, pee your pants, vomit inducing thrills. I’ll be zip-a-dee-doo-dahing down Splash Mountain and singing “Drink Up Me Hearties, Yo Ho” at the top of my lungs on my sixth go round on Pirates of the Caribbean. Yo ho, yo ho, a Disney life for me.

My only issue with Disney parks stems from one glaring omission: alcohol.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m not advocating the sale of Jager shots outside Mr. Toad’s Wild Ride. I’m perfectly fine singing “drink up me hearties” without actually doing so on Pirates of the Caribbean. I don’t want to get hammered at Mickey’s house. I just want a frosty beverage to take the edge of a hot, tiring day at the Park. A brief oasis from the heat and crowds.

You can imagine my surprise upon walking up to the Tusker House Restaurant – an outdoor African market themed eatery at Disney’s Animal Kingdom park – to see a list of about 15 different beers, nearly half of them actually imported from Africa, prominently displayed on the drink menu.

Mickey + Animals + Good Food + theme appropriate imported beer = Heaven on Earth.

Glory, glory hallelujah.

Tusker Beer

Beer. At a Disney Park. Nuff said.

I ordered a round of Tusker – a Kenyan Lager- for my family, kicked back and enjoyed the sublime pleasure of the Happiest Place on Earth getting a little bit happier. I vaguely remember how the beer tasted – light, smooth and crisp with a hint of caramel – but, truth be told, I was too caught up in the moment to give the flavor any thought. A Miller Chill would have tasted like a Chimay Blue at that moment.

Jiminy Cricket was right, dreams really do come true.

A humorous afterthought: While drinking the beers, my older brother, who traveled to Kenya a few years ago, told us that Tusker was one of the two best selling beers in Kenya along with Guinness and that the slogans for each beer indicated the comical disparate ideologies of their respective target markets.

Tusker goes by the slogan “Bia Yangu, Nchi Yangu”, which translates to “My Beer, My Country”.

Guinesss is marketed using the slogan “Guiness is Power”.

Can you guess which one was founded by Africans for Africans and which one was originally imported by the British colonialists?

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